Could be considered a curse

By Philip Pfanstiel

“It could be considered a curse to succeed at something that is not your calling.”

My dad, Carl Pfanstiel, and I went to a conference in Indianapolis this past weekend (will share more about that conference in the future) and on the way back this came out in our conversation.

It was one of those moments where you say something and you’re like “whoa, that was much deeper than anything I could have come up with!”

The struggle for me has been hearing God, receiving a lot of promises, acting on them and being underwhelmed by the response.  A year after moving to Tulsa during praise and worship I heard “you’ve planted a lot of good seeds that I can bless.”

Enter the next year and a half of continued struggling.  “What’s up with that God!?”

Around the same time I had a similar discussion with God that had an edge of accusation to it (okay, I was pretty upset) and heard “a lot of people judge Me based off of incomplete knowledge.”  Again, “whoa, that was way beyond me!”

So I’m trying to hold Words, dreams, visions, insights, observations, talking donkeys (you know, the ways that God seems to talk to people) loosely and allow God to unfold and reveal them in His time and way.

Heard this thought at a meeting a bit back, “Many of us pray for God to bless our plans.  How many ask how we can be part of His Plan that is already (beyond) blessed?”

This reminds me of the old Garth Brooks song “Unanswered Prayers” with the lyric (as I recall it) “Sometimes God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.”  Incomplete knowledge and yet in my infinite foolishness I have judged and accused the Almighty.

And the weirdest thing – He seems to be okay with it.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t talk bad about God to others.  Usually when I’m upset I go straight at Him – and He has answered (and still answers) in some of the most kind, sensitive and meaningful ways. 

In the journey I’ve taken with my kids the last few years there has been quite a few honest / raw talks.  The irony is that some of the biggest breakthroughs in our relationships come AFTER some very hard even uncomfortable talks.  I don’t know why that is, I suspect it’s because the walls have come down and we’re finally honest and vulnerable with each other.

It seems, IMO, that God is okay with us going to Him and throwing a fit.  That is what children do with their fathers.  When we go to others and talk bad about our father – the guilt and shame creates an unnecessary barrier.  But when we go straight at Him we find out how good of a dad he really is.

Returning to the Call.  How many of us know what our calling is?  Chuck Missler would often quip “the two best days of our life is the day we get saved and the day we find out why” (ie. What our call / purpose is).

Obviously I think there is a lot of truth to that or I wouldn’t quote it 🙂

What if every prayer was answered?  What if every door opened?  What if everything we put our hand to prospered?  Would the results be a blessing to us or a curse?  Would we fulfill our potential while missing our purpose and find the blessing is actually a curse?

My personal prayer (which I may very well regret in the short term but will be thankful for in the long term) is “Lord, may success only come when I’m fulfilling the part you have for me in Your plan.”  Until then I’ll take every wall I bump into as a loving reminder that there’s something greater.